Birthday Changes

(If you want a deeper understanding, read Birthday Blues  first)

One more day to my birthday and I decided to not go clubbing anymore. Clubbing can wait till after my finals. Right now, I should focus on my finals. I have to make up my mid-term grades. I have to. I don’t want to retake.

Right now, my mind keep saying “You can do this”. That’s how I feel right now although I’m pretty sure at one point I’ll feel discourage.

The point is, I’m going to regret putting my finals before my much wanted birthday celebration at the club. Everyone only turns 18 once. I know that but sacrifices must be made if you want to succeed in life.

So the new plan is that we have a nice dinner with friends together. That sounds really mild but okay to me. Studies is owning 90% of my plans and thoughts now. And plus, dinner seems quicker anyways.

And plus, I think it’s better that everyone else studies too, instead of wasting the night away clubbing. Wasting time can come after the finals.

Furthermore, I’m doing this for my friends who are coming to visit me. That way I won’t freak out about not studying enough.

Oh the sacrifices we make for other things.

And then my counselor’s voice ring into my mind, “Treat yourself better. Don’t be so hard on yourself. Sometimes you have think about yourself more than others.” 

Me right now : Hmm….. I’m not exactly doing that am I? But I am sorting out priorities..? Sort of? 


Signing off,

cloe_shadowscar xx


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