I Wish

Here’s a poem of how I feel lately… Sometimes, I look at people and wish I could have a part of them in me instead of always facing my demons. Other times, I get frustrated about them.

I wish I could be like you, 

Game all I want.

But still able to cope,

With life itself. 

I wish I could be like you,

Able to focus when I want to.

Instead of feeling frustrated,

Words jumping off pages.

I wish I could be like you,

Always happy.

Never taking the blade,

Never hand kissing the wall.

I wish I  could be like you,

Living in the moments.

I don’t want to stay in the past,

But they seem to haunt me.

I wish I could be like you

Feeling everything normally.

Instead of feeling rather hollow,

Like an empty vessel.

I wish I could be like you, 

Then I wouldn’t need pills.

I could do everything like I was before,

Never losing sight of ambition.

I wish I could be like you,

Finding everything a breeze. 

Enjoying what you think I should,

instead of feeling crippled. 

I wish I could be like you,

Believing in something.

I guess it’s difficult for me,

but easy for me to lose faith.

I wish I could be like you,

not feeling scared all the time.

Putting up the mask,

to pretend as if everything’s fine.

I wish I could be like you,

Since you have people running over to help you.

And it’s different when I need help

Where do I even get help?

But sometimes, I wish you could be more like me,

Seeing what I see, 

The demons around me,

Draining my energy.

I wish you could be more like me,

Understanding why I get  mad.

Instead of always thinking you are right,

while I give in to you.

I wish you could be more like me,

Sensitive to words.

Taking in the hints,

And then giving me a helping hand.

I wish you could be more like me,

Accompany me when I need it.

But you’re always unavailable,

And I’m always available.

I wish you could be more like me,

Going on adventures.

Doesn’t matter how far,

as long as we’re together.

I wish you could be more like me,

Thinking ahead about dates.

The numbers that matters,

I guess I’m the only one who does it.

I wish you could be more like me,

Not counting the papers.

Because if it’s you,

I wouldn’t even mind.

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